My Madden 11 purpose is served. Tim Tebow is in the Hall of Fame.
On the eve of Madden 12, I can honestly say that my year-long task of getting my left-handed, twinkle-toe Tebow to the HOF is my most satisfying accomplishment in any sports video game.
A taste of what could actually be or just a dumb fantasy only attainable in virtual reality? Whatever anyone has to say about Timmy-T can stuff it. He can do anything … with my coaching.
Here’s how it went down:
- I always do fantasy draft franchises, but I make everything random. The only thing I do is pick the team, in this case, the Arizona Cardinals because of the alternate black jerseys.
- Tim Tebow ended up being my backup in the beginning. I think Matt Cassel was the starter, but it took just a few games before I handed the franchise over to Tebow. He’s a poor man’s Michael Vick: A left-handed scrambler who can hit the long passes.
- Back in the real world, chatter grew about Tebow’s potential as an NFL quarterback. It fueled me to dedicate every second on Madden to Tim’s HOF bid. No online games, no other game modes.
- I I was a run-first team*, but I had Dez Bryant, who was a stud (96 overall). If I just passed to him every now and then, Tebow would get a good rating with solid TDs, though he was skimpy on the yards. (On two occasions, my running back fell to injury for more than half a season, prompting me to put everything on Tebow. It wasn’t my style, but fun while it lasted.)
- Conclusion: I played the game on All-Pro about 70 percent of the time with the other 30 percent on All-Madden and I simulated the last two seasons. After 14 seasons at the age of 37, Tim Tebow retired as the No. 5 touchdown passer with 433 (No. 1 Peyton Manning had 535). He also has the single season record for TD passes with 55.
It was a great ride even though it means absolutely nothing.
But in all seriousness, I do think that Tim Tebow can be a successful football player if given the chance. And as such a swell guy, he deserves it.
*The Greatest Human Being Who Never Lived
His name would be DeVonte Bryant.
He would decimate Emmitt Smith’s career rushing record of 18,355 by more than 10,000 yards. Bryant would set a forever unmatchable record 31,471 rushing yards and 455 touchdowns, almost 300 more than the next guy.
There are six men in the 2,000-rushing yard club. Bryant would get there three times. And he would ascend to an unprecedented 3,000-rushing yard club … six times.
He would retire as not only the greatest football player, not only the greatest athlete, but the greatest human who ever lived. But he will never live. Madden just let me borrow him for the prime of his marvelous life. I bid him an honorable farewell.